Lord has another year really flown by? This is the time of year when I get to pull out my journals and reflect on the journey thus far. The past 8 months have taken me to places I don’t think I was prepared to go. Well that isn’t entirely true Lord, my trust in your ability is the reason I’ve made it! A few hundred pages in a dozen journals could never express where I’ve been spiritually, mentally, or physically. Every year I’m amazed at the big things, the small things and all the other things in between. Lord I realize with every passing day that you don’t have to do it! You don’t have to allow grace and mercy to follow me. You don’t have to protect me from the plots of the enemy. You don’t have to provide for my needs. You don’t have to babysit my children. You don’t have to constantly reveal how awesome you are to me. You don’t have to love me to life. There are a lot of adjustments I need to make. Hurts from people I’ve allowed myself to trust over and over again have kept me more isolated than necessary. No more! Lord you know all about me, you know why my heart closes in and why it has the ability to shut people out. I am not going to make you any promises I never intend to keep. I ask in earnest Lord for your help in helping me DECREASE so you might INCREASE in every area of my life. When I find it hard to forgive, help me remember you forgave me. Lord,You have taught me so much this year. For starters, you taught me proper weight distribution. Burdens I was never required to carry are yours now. I do not wish to carry the luggage from last year into this one. My back is tired from hauling other people’s luggage. My arms are tired from refusing to let some people and places go. My soul is tired because I’ve slept on satiny sheets stained with sin. My mind is tired because I’ve meditated on meaningless matters. My eyes are tired because so many times, I’ve only focused on SELF. My ears are tired because I’ve only heard the whisper of Hell. My will is tired because I’ve tried to walk away from Jesus. My life is tired because I’ve tried to live it without your love to lead me. Today I am imagining a world, a year, a life where I can forgive those who hurt me without remembering why I was hurt. Today I pack the luggage of my past to make room for the future. Lord you are not another entry in my journal, you are the reason I write!