Monday, January 11, 2010
Writing Out Loud: The Last Place
I doubt anyone pays much attention to any of my posts. If you have you’d know I’ve struggled with “religion” and its exhausting attempts to harness what God placed inside of me. I’ve struggled with the hypocrisy of the church. The church preaches Jesus paid for everything I’ve done on the cross but continues to charge me for a debt I can’t ever pay. Through this struggle God told me upfront to depend on His authority and His alone. What is that? True to His Word, God showed me how to take His Word and find who or what contradicts what He said. I can’t even begin to reveal what I discovered. I will say there are many people, many who get up on Sunday morning and preach, teach, sing, and pray, merely practicing what they’re preaching against. God showed me that for many people in the ministry it’s just a “job” one that garners a paycheck. God made this abundantly clear: “April if a church can’t handle your phone calls, why would you trust it with your spiritual matters?” I have since given up on “religion” but I will never give up on my “relationship” with God. You see the entire time I’ve been reading and studying my bible, anything that struck me as odd, I would ask God “would you say that?”, and He would say “No I wouldn’t!” We want so much to believe in the people who are tasked with caring for our spiritual matters but when God shows you the truth it simply can’t be disputed. I didn’t want anything to do with church after that, so imagine how I felt when God sent me back to the “last place” I left.
I was given such a wonderful gift on yesterday in the “last place” I expected to receive anything. I bet you’d like to know what it was huh? It was a hug from a complete “stranger” or so I thought. Yesterday I lost my cell phone and as I went about retracing my steps, I kept coming in contact with “strangers” in a “familiar” place. I was taken by the tireless efforts of one particular “stranger” who seemed to be going out of their way to assist me in locating my phone. I knew I had insurance on my phone so losing it was no big deal, but it was just “one more thing” in a long list of “things lately. It’s a very sad commentary about the state of the world but I am always shocked when people keep their word where I’m concerned. To an observer it would appear that I happened upon this “stranger” by mistake. In retracing my steps to recover my phone, I returned to the "last place" I remembered having seen it. The place was completely void of people but the Holy Spirit prodded me to keep walking. I ran into the “stranger” explained my situation. The “stranger” let me use the phone to call my mother. I sobbed uncontrollably because at that very moment I couldn’t remember my mother’s number (I’ve gotten so used to just clicking “M” for Mother). Anyway the “stranger” had misplaced a work out tape, had only come back to find it and that’s how we intercepted each other. She gave me the number to the “last place” and said I could call anytime. We were both looking for something we’d left in the “last place” we thought to look. Now get this I wasn’t tripping about the phone it was feeling uneasy about being in the “last place” I’d seen it. I had no idea that while I’m at Verizon having my service suspended, the “last place” is making arrangements with my mother to pick up my phone. I tell you when this “stranger” hugged me I felt the power of God and was moved to tears. The “stranger” from the “last place” personally called me at home to make sure everything was okay. To make a long story short the “last place” I’d seen my phone and lost it was a church I’d visited. Now doesn’t this speak to how good God is? The first place was the “last place”, my new church home!