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My Joy Is Contagious Make Sure You Catch It!

I always tell people that any day above ground is a good day! I hope your day is wonderful and blessed! Feel free to share your thoughts!
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Thursday, December 23, 2010

Holiday Cheer?


It is a veritable mad house out here as Holiday Shoppers scurry from store to store hoping to find the “perfect” gift. I have to laugh because just this afternoon, I chanced to hear a man declare his love for someone and proceed to complain about spending $11.00 on a thermos! On my way to the bookstore I caught the tail end of a traffic accident. I bet it wasn’t the Holiday cheer that led to this 3 car fender bender but a preoccupation with commercialization. Many people like myself, can’t wait for the long lines, impatience, and materialism to be over. I like to think I’m lucky because this year my children only want money. Does it ever get old the pushing, the shoving, the profanity to grab another television we don’t need? There are people who have to spike their eggnog just to get through the Holidays. What does a perfect gift look like anyway? Is it expansive? Does it sparkle? Does it have to come from a major Department Store? Would I even recognize it without the help of a Salesperson?
How would you feel if on your next birthday everyone you cared for was totally oblivious? What if there were no cake, no gifts, no cards, and no song? At its most basic level, Christmas is about Christ! Christmas tends to overlook Christ in favor of electronics, argyle sweaters, and toaster ovens. I wonder how Jesus feels every year when His birthday is used to justify excessive spending or just not even being the focal point at all. This entire month of December my Pastor has taught a sermon series entitled “Simply Christmas” and it’s been a real eye opening experience. Maybe it’s just the culture in Western Civilization to always want more stuff than we know what to do with. I pray that we never forget Christmas is not for sale. Oh we love to boast that Jesus is the reason for the season. Is He really? When was the last time you gave Jesus a sacrificial gift of praise? When was the last time you included Him in your Holiday plans? He deserves our gift of praise. It is a very costly gift but so was Calvary.
I won’t keep you long, lest you get a paper cut from wrapping gifts, I will leave you with this!
“If you are still searching for the perfect gift to get my Father, He still loves praise”~Jesus Christ

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Journal Entry 15 December 2010

Lord has another year really flown by? This is the time of year when I get to pull out my journals and reflect on the journey thus far. The past 8 months have taken me to places I don’t think I was prepared to go. Well that isn’t entirely true Lord, my trust in your ability is the reason I’ve made it! A few hundred pages in a dozen journals could never express where I’ve been spiritually, mentally, or physically. Every year I’m amazed at the big things, the small things and all the other things in between. Lord I realize with every passing day that you don’t have to do it! You don’t have to allow grace and mercy to follow me. You don’t have to protect me from the plots of the enemy. You don’t have to provide for my needs. You don’t have to babysit my children. You don’t have to constantly reveal how awesome you are to me. You don’t have to love me to life. There are a lot of adjustments I need to make. Hurts from people I’ve allowed myself to trust over and over again have kept me more isolated than necessary. No more! Lord you know all about me, you know why my heart closes in and why it has the ability to shut people out. I am not going to make you any promises I never intend to keep. I ask in earnest Lord for your help in helping me DECREASE so you might INCREASE in every area of my life. When I find it hard to forgive, help me remember you forgave me.  Lord,You have taught me so much this year. For starters, you taught me proper weight distribution. Burdens I was never required to carry are yours now. I do not wish to carry the luggage from last year into this one. My back is tired from hauling other people’s luggage. My arms are tired from refusing to let some people and places go. My soul is tired because I’ve slept on satiny sheets stained with sin. My mind is tired because I’ve meditated on meaningless matters. My eyes are tired because so many times, I’ve only focused on SELF. My ears are tired because I’ve only heard the whisper of Hell. My will is tired because I’ve tried to walk away from Jesus. My life is tired because I’ve tried to live it without your love to lead me. Today I am imagining a world, a year, a life where I can forgive those who hurt me without remembering why I was hurt. Today I pack the luggage of my past to make room for the future. Lord you are not another entry in my journal, you are the reason I write!

Amazed by Your Grace!

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Writing Out Loud: Let There Be Light!

If you’ve ever had the flu you know how wretched your body feels. For days I’ve suffered through aches, pains, chills, congestion, a runny nose, dizziness and the most harrowing of all, no Starbucks. Yesterday however, I thought I was feeling better that is until I got out of the bed! My gut reaction was to try to “shake” it off, put on several layers of clothing, and face the blustery cold awaiting me outside. It took my last ounce of strength to find the bed post and steady myself. I held on about 5 seconds before collapsing against the eight pillows I sleep with! Today I felt the fever had left me, my head stopped throbbing so I decided to try again. I repeated the sequence of events that make up my normal “Morning Routine”, and as I type this blog from Starbucks, I know that nothing beats a failure except another failure that succeeds. As soon as I opened the door this afternoon, I was pelted by the rays from the sun! While squinting, I reached for my nonexistent sunglasses and waited until I got my bearings.
I thought about what it must feel like for a new believer or a believer in a backslidden state. It is hard to adjust to the light after being in darkness for so long. Our spiritual eyes need time adjust after being in the natural. I think many people fumble around in the darkness because of the lies Satan uses to thwart the Kingdom of God. The biggest trick in Satan’s arsenal is the power of suggestion! Think about it this way! Before he was kicked out, Satan was in heaven yet many people won’t see heaven because of what Satan shows them about God. The amazing part of this anecdote is this: We get used to being in the same atmosphere, being around the same friends, or wearing a certain style of clothing, but eventually change is going to come! I welcome God’s light! Will you? Change will always come and it will demand a choice. Choose the Light of the World!

I leave you with this question:

If God’s Light has CONVICTED you, are you CONVINCED now that He only CHASTISES His CHILDREN because He CARES for them?



Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Writing Out Loud: Growing Pangs

I’m a creature of habit and I tend to do a lot of “people watching” whenever I’m out. The other day I saw a Father overjoyed by the company of his daughter. Instantly I felt a pang of longing because I’ve never had such an experience. I watched this man become totally engrossed in his daughter’s discussion on a movie she’d watched. For nearly 40 years I’ve often wondered what my life might have been like had I grown up in a home with love. Don’t get me wrong, I grew in a nice home, there were two parents who lived there as well, but that was about the extent of it. I believe wholeheartedly many of the “issues” I have stem from not having anybody care beyond a “surface” level about me. I’m ashamed to admit how long it took me to call God Father. The man who terrorized me for the better part of my childhood didn’t exactly exhibit the qualities of a Father. My family reminds me of a darkroom. Nobody cares much except the photographer about the processing of the film, but we all want a pretty picture don't we? Through God’s lens I zero in on my own family. I’m amazed we define it as such when tiny factions of people who just happen to be related by blood would seem more applicable. Beyond “regular” church attendance, Godly examples are few and far between. Life hasn’t seemed to have matured, mellowed or marinated the “seasoned” adults at all. I think after a considerable amount of time, some sort of evolution should take place. This metamorphosis starts inward in the heart. So when I look at middle aged people who don’t seem to have grown emotionally or spiritually, I view it as a heart issue not a health issue. I depend on God, my Father now for my spiritual upbringing. God promises me He longs to be a Father to me. He wants to be the “Daddy” who lets me crawl lovingly into His lap every night when He gets home. He wants to be the Mother who listens earnestly to the dreams of her little girl. He wants to be the brother or sister who takes up for me when the world comes against me. He wants to be the immediate family I can depend on for sound advice. I’ve always wanted a Father. Now I have one in God.

Thanks4Giving

Just a quick video I filmed today to be mindful of those who are less fortunate than you this Holiday season! Enjoy your family and friends but after the turkey has digested,take a moment to reflect on how good God has been to you! Be blessed! be safe! Most of all, Be thankful!


Sunday, November 7, 2010

Writing Out Loud: Making The List!

Lists are interwoven into the fringe of the average person’s life. Lists are everywhere, providing numerical, alphabetical or bulleted instructions helping us achieve maximum efficiency in an otherwise clueless existence. What about you? When you see another “list”, do you adhere to the “guidelines” set forth or do you ignore the anal retentive person and his or her “Type A” personality behind it? Lists are everywhere! They help us at the grocery store. Lists help us perform our daily tasks at work. Lists even tell our children where to put the dishes after they’ve emptied the dishwasher. I’m a firm believer that at least for some of us, lists make our chaotic lives more manageable, less stressful ......orderly somehow. Many of you probably already know that I love to read, but did you also know I am also partial to bookmarks too? It’s true! Anytime I purchase a book, I always try to find a book mark to go with it! The only setback, is the very rare occasion I loan my books out, I usually don’t get my bookmarks back either! I purchased an interesting bookmark recently. This bookmark listed 50 books to be read before you die. I began to read down the list of books noticing some very popular names: Steinbeck, Austen, Tolstoy, Shakespeare, Bronte and Joyce. So I’m thinking how freaking cool I must be because I’ve actually read or am reading books by many of these authors. I took a closer look at this bookmark and I noticed that one of the books listed was the Holy Bible. Again I laughed, because I probably have more versions of the Bible than the actual list of books. The thought in my head now is surely an “expert reader” must have compiled such an exhaustive list. I still marvel at God’s ability to use the “foolish things to confound the wise” like using a bookmark to express how important it is to read His Word. Will you read the Holy Bible now? I mean it’s on a list with Oscar Wilde for goodness sake! The Holy Bible is not just a collection of unbelievable stories. The Holy Bible embodies one central theme from beginning to end: God’s redemptive plan for His children, who He loves dearly! I pray there is an unction deep inside your spirit that propels you to read the Holy Bible, not because it was on a list, but because your life really does depend on it.







Friday, November 5, 2010

Bounce Back Woman Pt. 2

Filmed 05 November 2010 God hasn't forgotten about you Dear Sister and neither have I. So me and my once bounceable ball are back to see how you're doing! yeah I know it still hurts, but you have to get up right now! Believe it or not people besides the people you need to let go of need you! Always remember WHO God says you are!

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Journal Entry 21 October 2010

Yesterday I had a killer headache! I’m talking about the kind where any sudden movement seems life threatening. I suspected from the very onset, my headache was a culmination of many things: low glucose, stress, anxiety, mood swings, weather changes, frustration and your “normal” female angst. I admit I probably think too much and have a tendency to over analyze things to death. For some reason, knowing minute details give me a certain degree of comfort or maybe the better word is control. Maybe answers help me feel protected from questions the “unknown” can always raise. My headache reminded me a lot of the unknown. My head seemed to only hurt when I concentrated more on things I truly didn’t need to know but wanted to know right then. I think sometimes we expect you to microwave your promises and slow cook the pain. I am figuring out as I go Lord that most of our pain is self induced, brought on by a deep-seated need to have power over our own lives.
It has been an interesting couple of weeks indeed! Maybe age is responsible, but I’ve noticed lately I need extra time to mull over the events of an otherwise routine life. Once I’ve had time to process my thoughts only then am I able to develop them in a more concrete fashion. I’ve needed the additional time to review relationships, questions, answers, decisions, mistakes, actions, deeds, words and promises. There are days Lord, when I see with such clarity and others where I feel as though I am wandering around in the daytime with a flashlight. I had a fascinating conversation tonight with a local businessman and a future mayoral candidate. I listened intently as both gave their answers on everything from the imploding mortgage crisis to Communist China. I think answers are easier to give than the questions they garner. Mostly I think we walk in circles expecting the answers to come directly to us. I’m thankful Lord that you are still the answer before the question is asked!
Amazed by Your Grace!



Thursday, September 30, 2010

Writing Out Loud: What YOU put FIRST

I was 200 pages into a popular book series before I realized I was reading them out of order! This little blunder became the mechanism that recalled recent moments in my life when more than a few things seemed to be out of sync. Sometimes the busyness of life even a simple one like mine can make us forget what is really important. Even if your life revolves around keeping the Ten Commandments, you can lose sight of what’s really important. Have you ever felt like you were losing sight of your authentic self amid the countless images projected at you? I think it’s the small things over time rather than one big thing at once causing many of us to get off track. Aren’t you relieved though that one certainty in life is that God never changes? So on those days when my flesh renders my spiritual life fickle I know God consistently waits for me to find my way back to Him.

When things start to go awry in my life I always try to look at the condition of my relationship with God. Have I been praying? Have I been reading the Bible? Have I been attending worship services on a regular basis? Have I really been doing all the things it takes to maintain a thriving relationship with God? If the answer to more than one of those questions is no, I know therein lies the problem. Oddly enough the series I’m reading delves very candidly into priorities and what we think is important verses what truly is. Where is God in your life? Do you reach for Him first thing in the morning or your Smartphone? Is God the only option or is He your last resort? If He needed to get in touch with you, could He locate you easily or would He find you underneath the stench of sinful mire? Is He just another sticky note on your fridge? Do you talk to Him even when you don’t need anything? Can He rely on you to reach others with what He’s placed inside you? Do you even believe that He really is God? I ask again, where is God in your life?

I’ll leave you with this little nugget “What you put first orders everything else!”

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Journal Entry 09 September 2010

Lord my heart is heavy right now and with good reason. Moments ago I learned that the wife of Marvin Sapp succumbed to her battle with colon cancer. Though I did not know her personally, I do know what it’s like to lose a loved one. Lord how many precious moments do we take for granted each day? Life truly is fleeting the way it dissipates like a fine mist. There’s no other recourse but to do what I’ve always done, pray. I find myself praying for strangers more and more. The people I meet are divine appointments that must be kept. Lord right now, I ask that you would meet the needs of every person who has asked me to pray for them right now. These requests include deliverance from fornication, homosexuality, lust, drug addiction, salvation, cancer, financial woes, reconciliation with families, adultery and so on. Lord you know the real story behind every name on my list. I appreciate so much Lord you trust me with your children. Last week I was spiritually drained after warring all night on behalf of a friend in need of prayer and I came through victoriously. This spiritual battle is ongoing and not at all for the faint-hearted, therefore I am not ashamed that there are three bibles before me as I sit in Border’s replenishing my soul. This morning I got a text from my daughter asking if I could pick her after school. I’m looking forward to it because how many moments do I really have?   My heart is also heavy because I’m grieved by the increasing racial intolerance in this country. There are people in this country doing so many wonderful things and yet it is still the bigots that are awarded face time. I’ve read in the Word how you’ll use foolish things to confound the wise. I look at my own children, even my twin nieces and I am so proud of their willingness and acceptance of others. I think anyone harboring hatred could learn a lot from watching children. Fear mongering is the worst bait to use but ignorance always seems to catch a fish looking for a worm. What’s going on in this world shows me that people would prefer to protest before they pray. Lord though I am not Muslim, I am vehemently opposed to the extremists who have proposed to burn the Quran this weekend. This detestable and vile act is nothing more than a publicity stunt to bail out a church facing financial ruin. There are extremists in every religion and I do hope all of us can one day accept this as fact. How many people are slapping your Holy, marvelous, powerful name on their ungodly crap that came from their own warped minds? Lord it’s distressing to watch people who claim to spread your inclusive message, harming people with divineness and racially charged bullet points. How can so many people who profess to love you misrepresent you with their actions, their words, and their deeds? Before I go, I wanted to express my gratitude for what you did for me yesterday. Angels are indeed everywhere and I came face to face with one named Karen. Her words brought so much comfort to me. What I liked especially was that this was a middle-aged Caucasian lady who I didn’t know from a can of paint, taking a moment to speak a word to me. My skin pigmentation didn’t hamper her obedience one iota. A stranger with familiar words, imagine that?
Amazed by Your Grace!

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Writing Out Loud: And the Real Enemy Is...


Do you ever gasp when you catch yourself condemning people for the very things you too are guilty of? I was making my rounds on the Social Networking Circuit earlier when I happened to read a comment concerning the South Carolinian mother accused of murdering her two small children. Now when these types of stories hit the airwaves, I always try to glean from the commentary of my peers in cyberspace whether the world is progressing or regressing. I wasn’t too surprised to see very little compassion for this woman who obviously could have used some help. It should make us as citizens of one of the richest countries in the world wonder how so many people are overlooked until they’re the top story on the evening news. This “young” lady proceeded to sentence the mother of this heinous crime to hell and rather than helping the situation, she came off sounding completely self-righteous and God-like. In no way do I wish to convey that taking the lives of innocent children is admirable. I would like to say this! Maybe you didn’t suffocate your children and strap them helplessly in the backseat of a car, but maybe you’re having sexual relations with a person to whom you aren’t married. Are you guilty of a crime? According to God you are! What should your punishment be? Years ago when I was young, and I felt hopeless, I had an abortion. Whether it’s the abortion I had or sending your children to a watery grave is just semantics but essentially both acts describe murder! Are you going to look at me differently now? What do you think is there is a difference in what I did back in 1991 and this mother in 2010? The “young” lady today stated unequivocally that this mother should go to hell. Should I?  Maybe passing judgment is easier when the crimes involve children. Consider however, the crimes Satan constantly commits against ALL of God’s children? We casually lounge around on earth acting as if we’re not being affected as a whole. The enemy unleashes havoc upon our marriages, homes, families, children, and relationships and we don’t bat an eye, yet some celeb drives a car that isn’t fuel efficient, and we have the audacity to act like we’ve been seriously offended. All it usually takes is some elaborate spin by an ambitious news anchor, and we think we got all the facts needed to pass sentence on somebody else. Pay attention to all the times you’ve made these sweeping, generalized statements about other people and the bad things they’ve done. What have you done? What sin haven’t you come clean about? Are you dealing with something so heavy in your life that maybe you’re entertaining thoughts of a base and ungodly nature? Do you know what it’s like to feel disparaged, despair, destitute, or disenfranchised? These harrowing news stories should make us flee to the safety of our Heavenly Father. I’ll leave you with this, if God’s grace was good enough for you why isn’t it good enough for anybody else who’s fallen short? A lot of the times what we dislike in other people is usually the very thing we see in ourselves.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Journal Entry 11 August 2010

Lord this has been one sobering week hasn’t it? Am I correct in my assumption that a major shift has occurred spiritually? It’s as if the truth were trying to knock me down these days to get my attention. The knocks on the front door of my heart were so loud I had no choice but to allow entrance. My posture is improving significantly as I relinquish heavy burdens my frame was never intended to carry. I can’t tell you how grateful I am for the ability to cry. The power of tears to cleanse the soul is amazing. I’m reminded of Psalms 56:8 and how you remind me that not even my tears are wasted, caring so much to even store them in bottles. You alone Lord have been my one constant source. There is truly none like you. If I could find one single moment where you weren’t there, I’d be lying. Who else but a loving God could patiently watch as his child tries to handle things on her own? Who else but a loving God could listen to His child as she tries to make some sense of the world around her? Who else but a loving God could watch His daughter sob uncontrollably for nights on end? Who else but a loving God could understand that His daughter is stronger than even she knows? Who else but a loving God could watch His daughter reach out to people only to feel ignored? Who else but a loving God could watch His child have her faith shaken by so many people in such a short time? Who else but a loving God could watch His daughter hold everything in until she can finally talk her Heavenly Father about it? Who else but a loving God could know that despite the traumatic events, His daughter believes what He said?   I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror today, and grace was reflected back at me. It is because of your grace I’ve come through on the other side of trials and tribulations with hardly any affect on my physical appearance. The blows I’ve been hit with haven’t killed me if anything they’ve made me more aware of the prominence you have in my life. Even with all the fiery darts aimed at me, I can’t imagine having gone through so much in my life just to get here, right on the verge of a mammoth breakthrough and give up. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt continually calling on the name of Jesus has prevented me from stumbling into a dark abyss. The easiest way I think for me to keep from falling is to look at the place I first started to stumble, not where I actually fell. Lord, please reveal the areas where I can improve, where I can be more discerning and prudent. Lord, please help me work out everything that seems to be distressing to me. Lord, please help me to forgive every single person who’s hurt me recently. Lord if there is anything in my life that does not add to my life, subtract it. I’m already looking forward to the New Year. Some people for reasons only known to you will undoubtedly remain in 2010. Going forward, I vow to take one day at a time. I promise to look in the mirror and speak only what you say about me and act like it’s so!
Amazed by Your Grace!

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Journal Entry 04 August 2010

Lord, why are some people able to get away with what they’re doing for so long seemingly with no repercussions? Why are some people allowed to manipulate every situation so that they always look completely innocent? Lord, why are some family members placed on such high pedestals and others considered black sheep? Lord, why do so many people remain silent when they see other people being wronged? Lord, will I always have to be the gracious one when clearly it’s the other person(s) involved who owe me an apology or at the very least, a certain degree of respect? Maybe it is the unanswered questions presently disturbing my psyche. My best friend tells me often that I am long overdue for an extra extended break. I just feel like I really need to get away from people who have hurt, persecuted, misused, and trampled upon me for far too long. I don’t think the word tired aptly describes how I’ve felt lately, but numb, lethargic, and listless certainly come to mind. I am very proud of myself for keeping my feelings in check even though deep seeded annoyance and frustration at so much crouches at my door. The events of late have brought everything full circle for me. When people show me who they really are, I have no choice but to believe them and file a copy away in my mental rolodex for future reference. What’s most troublesome for me is the unfair treatment I’ve received for years while the “heir apparent” was allowed a “free pass.” I doubt anybody but me can see how much silence, guilt, favoritism, and an unwillingness to admit wrong has cost us all. One thing is certain this is not my burden to carry anymore. I am no longer going to be responsible for how people treat me, only my response to how they treat me.  Too much has happened and I haven’t had time to process any of it. Last night on the phone I told my best friend I wished to climb to the top of a mountain and scream to the top of my lungs. I appreciate her not thinking I was being silly. I doubt she would ever think I was silly since she’s had to endure hours of my “venting”. Lord I am tired though! I am tired of being overlooked, left out, and forsaken, not by you but by those who profess to care about me. I often find myself wondering if anybody truly prays or cares for me at all. I am not ashamed to throw out yet another “fleece” in hope of gaining some clarity. Lord I confess that I am at the end of my rope, and the only thing I know to do now is tie a knot and hang on. I need to get away for a while. I am humble enough to seek you and ask you to help me until I can get some things sorted out and I wouldn’t dream of asking you to guide my steps if I weren’t willing to move my feet. I just need a drastic change right now. I’ve been considering moving abroad but I’d like to know what you think about it. All things considered, even if its strangers in a foreign land, I’d rather be celebrated than be around people who only tolerate me.

Amazed by Your Grace!

Friday, July 23, 2010

Let's Separate Laundry NOT Color

Are you still amazed that right after we've celebrated our Nation's Independence that the prevailing issue still in America is still skin color? We are here all here individually, uniquely with purpose in purpose. I think the only thing that should be separated by color is laundry! Be Blessed!

Friday, July 9, 2010

Writing Out Loud: Who's On Your Team?

What will basketball enthusiasts do now that one time “free agent” LeBron James is heading South? Well I suppose they will work through their grief and go on. LeBron’s primetime media blitz brought lawn mowers across the nation to a screeching halt. When making decisions one should carefully consider every available option. I believe wholeheartedly that this young man made the best decision based on the needs of his family and also his career. I mean really could you resist Florida and the opportunity to play for one of the greatest coaches ever? Whatever the outcome, I believe criticism would have followed. I’m most disappointed at the reaction from the fans of Cleveland. The shameful way in which they’ve behaved since the announcement only proves LeBron made the right choice. In a letter which was nothing short of acerbic, Cleveland Cavs owner, Dan Gilbert expresses everything except “Thanks!” None of us are in positions to feign amazement. This world has operated with a ‘thankless” mentality for thousands of years. We all pretend we’re happy to “go along to get along” until someone wises up and actually “gets gone!” This entire saga has proven that we only care about our own individual causes and concerns. The fabric of America has been interwoven with greed, selfishness, gluttony, self-indulgence, pride, arrogance, and contempt, and we have the impudence to question why we haven’t a shred of hope of leaving better legacies for future generations. It gives me tremendous relief to know that God’s love for all of us isn’t based upon how many records we sell, what sports team we play for, how many degrees adorn our walls or how many championship rings rest on our fingers. Whether they involved millions of dollars or not think about the choices you’ve had to make! Were the people who would be directly affected supportive or not? Everything LeBron James has done this past week has been cause for much speculation and innuendo. Before you make any decisions consult the Creator. Wisdom flows from God in the same way money does, but you can do so much more with it. I want to leave you with some Godly wisdom, a source we could all stand to tap into.



 

“A winner is not a winner because of what he has. A winner is a winner because of who he has. Who’s on your team?’ -AL Conley



 “Watch where your loyalty lies! Why? Because we’re often loyal to people that aren’t loyal to us”-Kevin Bond

Friday, July 2, 2010

Journal Entry 02 July 2010

Lord In a few days I will begin a new journal. I’ve been writing in journals for years and every time I close one out I become preoccupied with the one that doesn’t have a single entry in it. I wonder about all the events that will shape what’s written down. Some things take so long to process I can never fully explain it even with my boundless vocabulary. I do believe the first entry in a new journal sets the tone for all others. Lord, it sort of reminds me of how I get up every morning making sure that the first words I utter are now to you. The words I sow produce either a bountiful or a pitiful harvest. This is why I am careful to acknowledge you as the sole reason I have anything to write about.
Some entries are reminiscent of Jesus’ parables, simple short stories that have a point, others go on and on. One thing still holds true, I have tangible proof of many bad days and just as many good ones. As I embark on yet another leg of my journey, I leave many behind. I believe this next phase of my life won’t require as many people as my last one did. Suffice it to say, some family, friends, and foes won’t be permitted to travel with me any further. I’ve gotten to the point where I’m just done with foolishness. My course has been set, my steps ordained. Sadly I keep finding that the easiest way to let some people go is simply to drop them. What puzzles me is that some people will still refuse to get the hint.  Though there are days where I still find myself very preoccupied, there are others when my mind is undisturbed by the extensive amount of information I process each day. I love our early morning excursions. I enjoy looking at the world before man awakens each day. I’ve lost count of how many miles I’ve logged but I never forget your presence is all that matters. Lord you haven’t changed, you are changing me. I continue to see this continuing theme as it is woven throughout my life. I think a new journal makes another statement, that I can only live from moment to moment. This explains why the days several entries can fall under a single day. I wish to be more mindful of my moments, somehow hoping they count in eternity. Whatever happens in my life, should I feel nostalgic with a high degree of certainty I will never look at my journals and find one day in which you weren’t
Amazed by Your Grace!

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Setup For A Comeback



TODAY'S SCRIPTURE

"For though a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again"
(Proverbs 24:16a, NIV)

TODAY'S WORD

Life is full of things that try to push us down. We all face disappointments and setbacks. Maybe you got some bad news concerning your health, or maybe a relationship didn't work out. That was a setback. It's easy to get discouraged, lose your enthusiasm, or even be tempted to just settle where you are. But if we're going to see God's best, we have to have a "bounce-back" mentality. That means when you get knocked down, you don't stay down. You get back up again. You have to know that every time adversity comes against you, it's a setup for a comeback!  Remember, as a believer, the same power that raised Christ from the dead lives on the inside of you. There is no challenge too difficult, no obstacle too high, no sickness, no disappointment, no person, nothing that can keep you from your God-given destiny. If you stay in faith and keep a good attitude, you will rise again. God will turn those stumbling blocks into stepping stones, and you'll move forward into the victory He has in store for you!

A PRAYER FOR TODAY
Father in heaven, thank You for setting me up for success in everything I do. I choose to trust and rely on You knowing that Your plans are for my good. I know my best days are ahead of me and look ahead to the blessings You have in store for me. In Jesus' Name. Amen

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

LET IT GO!

I was all set to write a blog in which I conveyed these very thoughts but I wholeheartedly agree with Bishop Jakes and how he so eloquently stated all that I wanted. I think it's a timely word because just yesterday I posted "I feel your abscence but not your loss" and if I could for one moment really make 'it" plain" a song once said, "i aint missing you at all." If I had written this myself, I don't think I could have said it any better



There are people who can walk away from you.

And hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk away from you: let them walk. I don't want you to try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you. I mean hang up the phone. When people can walk away from you let them walk. Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left.



The bible said that, they came out from us that it might be made manifest that they were not for us. For had they been of us, no doubt they would have continued with us. [1 John 2:19]

People leave you because they are not joined to you. And if they are not joined to you, you can't make them stay.

Let them go.



And it doesn't mean that they are a bad person it just means that their part in the story is over. And you've got to know when people's part in your story is over so that you don't keep trying to raise the dead.. You've got to know when it's dead.



You've got to know when it's over. Let me tell you something.. I've got the gift of good-bye. It's the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in good-bye.. It's not that I'm hateful, it's that I'm faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to have He'll give it to me. And if it takes too much sweat I don't need it. Stop begging people to stay.



Let them go!!

If you are holding on to something that doesn't belong to you and was never intended for your life, then you need to......

LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to past hurts and pains .......

LET IT GO!!!

If someone can't treat you right, love you back, and see your worth......

LET IT GO!!!

If someone has angered you.

LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and revenge.....

LET IT GO!!!

If you are involved in a wrong relationship or addiction... ..

LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your needs or talents

LET IT GO!!!

If you have a bad attitude.... ...

LET IT GO!!!

If you keep judging others to make yourself feel better......

LET IT GO!!!

If you're stuck in the past and God is trying to take you to a new level in Him.........

LET IT GO!!!

If you are struggling with the healing of a broken relationship. ....

LET IT GO!!!

If you keep trying to help someone who won't even try to help themselves.. ....

LET IT GO!!!

If you're feeling depressed and stressed ............

LET IT GO!!!

If there is a particular situation that you are so used to handling yourself and God is saying 'take your hands off of it,' then you need to......

LET IT GO!!!

The Battle is the Lord's!'

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Lord of The Breakthrough

...the Lord has broken through my enemies before me, like the burstingout of great waters..."(2 Samuel 5:20, AMP) TODAY'S WORD from Joel and Victoria.

 God wants to give you a breakthrough-a sudden burst of His favor; anexplosion of His goodness. He wants to release His power in such a waythat it overwhelms you and drives out your enemies! Maybe you've been praying about a relationship for years, and suddenly,things get into place. That's a breakthrough. Or you were trying to geta certain job. They said there were no openings; but suddenly, they callyou back and you get the job. That's another breakthrough. Perhapsyou've struggled with an addiction for a long time, but then somethinghappens and it's not a struggle anymore. Those are all breakthroughs. No matter what you've been facing, no matter how impossible things look,know this: the God of the breakthrough wants to visit your house. Getready! Look for His favor and goodness. Remember, God rewards the peoplewho seek after Him. So keep expecting, keep believing because the God ofthe breakthrough is ready to overwhelm you with His goodness today! A PRAYER FOR TODAY Father in heaven, today I am expecting Your goodness. I am looking forYour favor. I'm trusting that You, the God of the breakthrough, areworking mightily on my behalf. Help me to live a life pleasing to You asI wait for Your hand to move mightily in my life. In Jesus' Name. Amen. It is God who arms us with strength and makes our way perfect.
Lord  Thank You for confirmation on my breakthroughat 5:20pm today

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Reflecting On Being "KIND"

Back when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a boy entered a coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of hm. “How much s an ice cream sundae?” “Fifty cents,” replied the waitress. The little boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and studied a number of coins in it. “How much is a dish of ice cream?” he inquired. Some people were now waiting for a table and the waitress was impatient. “Thirty-five cents,” she said angrily. The little boy again counted the coins. “I’ll have the plain ice cream.” The waitress brought the ice cream and hurried away. The boy finished, paid the cashier, and departed. When the waitress came back, she swallowed hard at what she saw. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, was fifteen cents~~her tip
Author Unknown

Monday, May 3, 2010

Journal Entry 03 May 2010

We’ve been friends so long I couldn’t imagine not calling “her” next year the day after my birthday to wish her “Happy Birthday.  Lord from the moment “Gerri” picked up the phone Saturday I intuitively knew something wasn’t right that something was different. Her voice was slurred to the point where it sounded almost childlike. I’m simply trying to understand through tears why she voiced with such “finality” “April I want you to come see me before the fall”? As soon as she uttered these words I wondered if her “summoning” me to Jacksonville, North Carolina would be the last time I ever see her again. It sounded so final, so extremely urgent. It reminded me of Jesus in the bible when he had to pass through Samaria. Lord help me please understand what’s going on and how best I can help my friend. It hurt me to depth of my soul to learn that she’d had another stroke but I was overwhelmed when she knew it was me on the other end of the phone. Lord I can’t lie, this hurts me to know my dear friend may in fact be transitioning even though I know you’ll take better care of her. Lord I don’t know how you’re going to do it but I believe you will make a way so I can get to see her before fall. I’m speaking right now that I already have new rear brakes and new rear tires should I have to make the drive myself. As much as I cried my only real concern was her salvation and that of her husband. I will continue to lift “Gerri” up. All I could think to do was to speak the Word over her. Lord I know your thoughts are not like mine, however you heal “Gerri” is alright with me. For the past 16 years we’ve called each other and sent cards to celebrate our birthdays. It’s funny but our birthdays being a day apart is one of the reasons we became friends. I also wanted to thank you for allowing me to cry on my best friend Kindahl’s shoulder through all of this. I haven’t had to deal with something so heavy in a long time. All I know is for the past 16 years I’ve sang some funny rendition of the “Birthday Song” to “Gerri” and it’s always made her smile, Saturday was no different. I hope I get to sing to her again May 1, 2011.
Amazed by Your Grace!

Monday, April 26, 2010

Journal Entry 26 April 2010


Lord I love getting up early in the morning and spending those first few moments of my day with you. I’m always assured on the days I do this my day will turn out wholly different than if I hadn’t. I was thinking about how different I am right now as opposed to last year at this same time. Is it really possible to grow so much just from deciding to “choose” you over everything else? I felt you in the gentle breeze that caressed my body as I rounded the track today. I knew you were “speaking” to me because the wind which is normally harsh and threatening sounded like a friendly whisper. Is it possible 16 weeks have passed by so rapidly? I’m so glad I not only I hear your voice, but I listen for it as well. Well the stage has already been set for the rest of this year. I don’t think it’s by happenstance that my life couldn’t have progressed any further until I found another place to worship you. There’s a “freedom” in being able to worship in the “unique” way in which I was created. I have an expressive, creative, artistic, sensitive, spirit and now I feel like its flourishing. No longer do I feel like everything you placed in me is being “snuffed” out by the guise of religion.  I’m reminded as I type of what my name means. It’s taken me a long time to embrace the significance of my name and why you chose it for me. Somehow “April” either fits or I grew into it, and I mean that in a “spiritual” context. I wanted to take a moment to thank you for anyone who has offered me sound counsel in recent weeks. Knowing there are those who I can call upon has been instrumental in helping me grow personally. There many things coming up Lord I wish to discuss with you. When things get a little “cloudy” I know I need get away for a while and gain some clarity. Even though I’m a “bachelorette”, and I live alone, there’s another kind of “solitude” I get only from your presence. I’ve noticed Lord that my tolerance for the “things of this world” gets lower and lower with each passing day. I bet no one would believe I don’t even watch television anymore. I’ve had to break more than a few “ungodly soul ties” with people unable to pick one side of the fence and stay on it. It is so disheartening to see to see the times we’re living in and how this “sense of urgency” to align their lives with you isn’t shared by all. Choices have to be made...wrong or right, good or bad, lust or love, heaven or hell. My “contacts” shorten by the week as I ask you to “continually” remove people from my life.  Going forward Lord there are things I didn’t believe were possible for me like love. When I talked to my sister this morning it made me cry when she shared how my brother-in-law expressed his love “publicly” for her. With tears in my eyes, I told my sister that I “want that” someday. Since you turned me into such a “lady” it’s only fitting you send me a “gentleman”. I hope my future husband is a lot like you. You are always willing to listen to me, you encourage me, you make me smile, you protect me , you provide for me, you let me cry, you make me feel so beautiful…..My sister told me today be to “be ready”. I told her I will. I’m ready to cook, I’m ready to hold hands, I’m ready to have his arms around me the rest if my life. The devil led me to believe I couldn’t have it, but then I met you Lord and you changed everything. I only ask this, that he always put me second only after you!
Amazed by Your Grace!

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Journal Entry 21 April 2010

Today Lord as I “cooled” down from my workout I forced myself to sit and listen to your heartbeat. I wanted so much to see Lord, if it matched my own. Lord thank you so much for allowing me some “private” time in our “spot” today. I really needed some “quiet” time with you. You always know exactly when to “reserve” the place where we can really talk. Can you believe my 39th birthday is next Friday? No I haven’t traded in my mid-sized sedan for a sports car, and I’m not wearing mini-skirts above the knee so I seriously doubt I’m going through a mid-life crisis. I’m not sure however, why I suddenly burst out in tears for no apparent reason. I’m not sad nor am I depressed. I think it’s just a realization that I’m entering a new phase of my life. I want the next couple decades to be filled with love, hugs, flowers, laughter, and tears, you know, all the ingredients that make a life. I’d like to think I’m entering the middle of my life without the excess baggage of my past. It’s a simple, monotonous, rather routine life I live, but I’m thankful now for clarity I didn’t possess a year ago. Lord there is still so many things I need to talk to you about too. We’re going to need many more “moments” like today. I look at my face, and though it has retained its youthful appearance, it has changed. My body is changing, everything is changing. I have no choice but to change with it. I sometimes think about how short life is and whether I’ll have time. I get it though, everything you’ve planned for me, I will accomplish while I’m here. I doubt I’m not the only single woman teetering on the threshold of menopause, gray hair, and crow’s feet, to ask, am I where I’m supposed to be in life?  Maybe I cried because in many respects I’ve had to finally admit even though I surrendered control of my life to you it’s scary nonetheless what awaits. I do wonder where your will is going to take me? What’s next in this next leg of my journey? Who will I leave behind? Who will dare to venture on the next leg of my journey with me? I guess I think too much don’t I? My inquisitive mind is always questioning, figuring, wondering, pondering, and working. There are days when I know I just need to sit still and listen for your gentle whispers. I heard you today Lord!
Until I can figure out my future, I’m going to enjoy my present.
Amazed by Your Grace!

Saturday, April 17, 2010

He Has A Girlfriend

He has a girlfriend

A girlfriend with a key
As long as she can come and go as she pleases
You and I won’t equal WE

He has a girlfriend
He has a girlfriend with a key
Too many people have access?
Now who is this posing as your queen?

He has a girlfriend
A girlfriend with a key
I’m your WD-40
Apply my love to your rusted hopes and dreams

He has a girlfriend
A girlfriend with a key
I’ll guard every door of your heart
With a lock like you’ve never seen

He has a girlfriend
A girlfriend with a key
Girl why did you leave his door open?
If you didn’t want another woman to see

He has a girlfriend
A girlfriend with a key
I want to open love’s door
Call me when the locksmith leaves

He has a girlfriend
A girlfriend with a key
It’s freezing in this cold rain
Open love’s door for me?

He has a girlfriend
A girlfriend with a key
I need to be reassured
Changing the locks can mean only one thing

He has a girlfriend
A girlfriend with a key
Won’t your heart be overcrowded?
If all us have spare keys

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Walking as A Cracked Pot

A couple months ago my sister blessed me with this short story.  I pray it ministers to you as it did me. Never let anybody tell YOU who YOU are NOT!
An excerpt from: The Emotionally Healthy Church by Peter Scazzero

There once lived a water carrier in India. He used two large pots for his task. He suspended a pole across his neck and attached a pot at each end of the pole. One of the pots had a big crack in it while the other pot was perfect. The perfect pot always delivered a full portion of water from the stream to the master's house, while the cracked pot arrived only half full each day.For two years this water carrier made the same journey.The perfect pot became proud of its accomplishments. The cracked pot was ashamed of its imperfections and miserable that it was able to accomplish only half of what it had been made to do.Finally,one day by the stream, the cracked pot spoke to his owner about his failure, "I am ashamed of myself,and I want to apologize that I have only been able to deliver half my water to your house. There is a crack in my side which causes water to leak out. Because of my flaws,you don't get the full value from your efforts."Then the water carrier replied,smiling, "As we return to the master's house, I want you notice the beautiful flowers along the path."  On that trip from the stream, the cracked pot looked around.  "Did you notice there are flowers only on your side of the path, but not on the other pot's side?" the master commented. "That's because I have always known about your flaw, and I took advantage of it. I planted seeds on your side of the path ,and every day while we passed these spots,you watered them.Now for two years I have been able to pick those beautiful flowers to decorate my master's table.  Without you being just the way you are,I would not have this beauty to grace his house." It is the way God works.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Writing out Loud: Ironing Out The Wrinkles

You do know that God uses the foolish things to confound the wise right? Well it’s true! This may not mean much to you but the clearest nugget of proof of how God changed my life is the fact that I iron occasionally. Don’t get me wrong, my mother made us iron our clothes every single night in preparation for the next day, but sometime between puberty and the United States Navy, I developed a serious loathing for it. While I was ironing recently, I thought about how even God’s Word alleviates all the wrinkles in my life.  What about you? What are you using on your “wrinkles” ?  From time to time, I receive a lot of calls from people who solicit my advice on a variety of “issues”. Care to know what I’ve discovered? Generally when people ask for advice especially in matters where there is absolutely no doubt that what they’re doing is wrong, they really don’t want advice, what they seek is absolution or justification for their behavior. I don’t think I could make it any clearer, but God isn’t in the habit of blessing hot funky messes! It doesn’t matter how we try to “straighten” it out and make it “look” smooth ourselves. Seriously, line up the things you’re doing with the Word of God and see if your life doesn’t look like a pile of balled up laundry on the floor. Can you smell it? God isn’t pleased nor is He appeased with our sacrifices. He’d rather we’d simply obey His word.
So the next time someone wants to know
I just met this awesome guy BUT he’s married?
I need some extra cash, it’s okay to cheat on my taxes?
You are going to help support my growing “bootleg” business?
We love each other! What do you think about me “shacking” up with my “boo”?
I need extra pens for my Mary Kay consultants, so I just steal them from work?
Take a moment and look at Psalm 139! He knows everything, there’s no escaping God who even knows how much hair we have on our heads. My question is this? Will you have the courage, the unmitigated gall to say IT”S WRONG? Will you take the “iron” clad truth of God’s Word to help them “straighten” the wrinkles out? Most of us already know the difference between right and wrong. We feel like what God has asked us to do is just too darn hard and it will cramp our style. What if Jesus thought dying on a Cross would cramp His style? Unless you prefer walking around looking like a discombobulated paper bag, I suggest you allow God to “iron” out the wrinkles in your life. God accepts us the way we are, but He refuses to let us stay that way. We reflect His glory don’t you want to look your absolute best? Can you imagine how sharp you’re going to look from this point on all decked out (wrinkle–free of course) when you decide to clothe yourselves in His righteousness?

Monday, April 5, 2010

Writing Out Loud: Justice Was Served

Are you there God, it’s me April? Lord do you ever laugh at our ridiculous attempts to erase you from your creation yet still try to maintain a degree of order? It cracks me up that most of our laws got their humble beginnings straight from the Bible, and seemingly worked fine until man was deluded into thinking somehow he was capable of dispensing justice without you. When will man in his finite wisdom see it’s utterly impossible to continually “chip” away the moral fiber this land was founded upon without creating complete anarchy?
Yeah…I’d like justice…served. I’d really like to know what you did to these people:
• The maniac driver who ran over my brand new Strawberry Shortcake Lunchbox?
• The greedy jerk that ate my 6” Seafood & Crab sandwich that I carefully hid in the back of the refrigerator in 1996?
• The clueless doctor who said my ruptured gallbladder was just indigestion?
• The crafty thief who stole my identity..twice?
• The lazy neighbor whose dog repeatedly craps in my yard?
• The sinister hacker who infected my pc?
Isn’t the law, the very idea of justice supposed to protect me from people like this? Individuals scream for justice but it’s usually the self serving kind. We usually don’t enjoy hearing the very traits we find offensive in others are the very traits we possess ourselves. What about all the people I’ve hurt? Are the people I’ve offended somewhere screaming “bloody murder” demanding, pleading with you to punish me severely for things I’ve done to them? Yeah how soon we forget about the things we’ve done acting as though we’re the only people to ever be hurt. We can bask in our ignorance and fool ourselves into thinking that eradicating you from the law and this land liberates us. We can take prayer out of schools. We can draft a law that imposes stiff penalties on those who would dare speak your name, but where will we be? I earnestly believe that the reason we’re unable to dispense justice is because our concept of the word has been misplaced. We try to emulate you by passing off a counterfeit version of you. Before there can be a counterfeit of something there must first be a genuine thing. Lady Justice depicts justice as being equipped with three symbols: a sword symbolizing the court's coercive power; a human scale weighing competing claims in each hand; and a blindfold indicating impartiality. What a farce? Justice is illusive, I don’t know if it’s even attainable or tangible with our warped perception, yet we all want it served swiftly and harshly. The real truth is we only want it when we we’ve been wronged not when we’re wrong. As is always the case you’ve given me something to think about by showing me that when I try to place judgment upon someone else, judgment that’s only reserved for you, I only bring judgment upon myself. Thank you Lord for allowing me to come to an understanding: grace is your giving all of us what we do deserve and mercy is you giving all of us what we don’t. What I find most interesting is according to your law, we each get a generous portion of grace and mercy served fresh every single day regardless of what we do or don't!

Friday, March 5, 2010

Writing Out Loud: State of the World


Earthquakes, famine, wars, pestilence, murder utter desolation is taking place right here, right now in the world and we care more about whether Jane Doe asked for paper or plastic. I don’t understand how or why we care so much about the ozone layer when the condition of our hearts is the real problem. The next time you go outside take a careful look at God’s creation. Do you still marvel that God placed the sun, moon and the stars in the sky? Or are you now inclined with all this New Age nonsense to think man did it? I think it is amazing that we all stand under the same sky yet we don’t all share the same horizons. I firmly believe our actions follow what we truly believe. We pretend to care so deeply about the earth with our gigantic blue recycling bins. We place them at the curb every week and somehow were convinced we’ve done our part. We do what we do best, live three different lives simultaneously: public, private, and secret. We’re ready to kill people for wearing fur coats. We shop at Whole Foods thinking an organic label is absolution. With all the chaos taking place in the world right now it’s no wonder I’ve been glued to Luke 21. Sometimes I can feel my spirit grieving over the condition man has left this world in. I feel as if the very earth itself is weeping. Everything man put puts his hands on, he ruins. Why is that? Well I believe it is because man in all his arrogance really believes he is in control and not God. I challenge you to go outside and listen to the earth weeping. Can you hear it? Can you feel it? Will you help heal it? Why don’t we stage more protests for peace not paper or plastic? Why don’t we use the airwaves to promote empathy not electric energy? Why don’t we strive for holiness not Whole Foods? It wouldn’t surprise me at all to find out the biggest lobbyist against killing animals were eating a big juicy delicious hamburger right now. We’re hypocrites and we’re good at practicing what we preach against. I’ll leave you with my protest sign…

The air that you breathe God did that!


The sun that warms you on a hot summer day, God did that!


The moon you wish you could walk on, God did that!


The stars that you wish upon, God did that!


This world man forfeited to Satan, Man did that!



















Thursday, February 11, 2010

Hey That's Not In My Bible

Disclaimer: This Thread in no way is meant to offend, take God’s Word out of context, nor are the examples literal
Anytime I need to take an inexpensive vacation, I open up a book. Books have an amazing power to expand our horizons, vocabularies and even our dreams. One of my favorite books of course is the Holy Bible. They vary in translation, but at last count I believe I had over 70. I got the idea for this blog actually while listening to my audio bible and I thought yeah, that’s just like God in that He uses the foolish things to confound the wise (like a Message Board to show us how incredibly cool He is). I thought of people in the bible and tried linking them characteristically to members of the Jackson family. I got my hair pinned on good this time and I can’t wait to see what YOU come up with.

p.s. You’re going not going to need a background in Theology but you might want to keep the language clean Jesus also listens in on these discussions

Joseph- Abraham Obviously a Patriarch, Father of many, left everything for a place unknown to him.

Katherine- Proverbs 31 Woman- you just have to read it!!!!

Rebbie- Mary of Bethany- because she chose to deviate from her work (entertainment) to sit at Jesus’ feet.

Jackie – Moses- only because He failed to delegate responsibility to others, which would’ve allowed him to accomplish more. He carried way too much on his shoulders that is until his Father-in-law gave him a stern talking too. Reuben- because as the eldest brother defended his younger brother Joseph. Pharaoh- because he tends to be just a little stubborn.

Tito –Zacchaeus was shorter in stature compared to everybody else but he climbed a sycamore tree and got Jesus’ attention.

Jermaine –Absalom maneuvered himself to usurp his father King David on the throne. Absalom was widely known believe it or not, for his hair and ultimately it was his gorgeous hair that led to his demise. King Saul-A very good looking very paranoid man and had a time taking responsibility for his disobedience. He was very unrepentant causing God to take the Kingship away from him. King Solomon- Very wise but because of his many relationships with those of the fairer sex, he was led astray from God.

Latoya- Tamar (Gen 38) was able to preserve her family by her astute ability to negotiate deals.

Marlon- Isaac avoided confrontations he seemed very caring and consistent. Isaac means laughter in the Holy Bible. Joshua- because he was always preparing to take the Israelites (family) to the next level.

Michael- Joseph was envied by his brothers and his prideful flaunting caused members of his family to sell him out. In the end he got out of the pit (earth) and ended up in the palace (heaven)

Randy-Simon Peter- the name means Rock, but I picked it only because he speaks his mind and often his Tweets seem frank and rather impulsive. Saul/Paul –because I truly believe Michael’s passing is his Damascus Road Experience.

Janet- Esther- Because she’s young, beautiful, and regal. She listened to the advice her family (Mordecai) gave her on her career plans









Monday, February 8, 2010

Writing Out Loud:This Too Shall Pass

Today my prayers go out not just to the Jackson family but the entire world. So many people are dealing with loss, hurt, pain, sickness, poverty, and disease. My prayer this day is that God sends his heavenly host to encamp around all of YOU. I pray the peace that surpasses ALL understanding over you. God never promised us that trials wouldn't come but only that we could overcome them John 16:33. I keep having one recurring thought this too shall pass. Even when our circumstances seem unstable, God is able. I think if I could explain God, He wouldn’t seem much like one. I accept that He is God, He is sovereign. He does what He wants, when He wants and with whom He wants. None of us are exempt from storms but the hands of Jesus can still the waves. I may never know the answers to all life’s questions. I have learned through my relationship (not religion) with Jesus to trust that God knows what He is doing and He promises it will work out for my good. When trials come, I believe it allows God to see your faith firsthand. Life has an overreaching capacity to knock us to our knees but the awesome thing is, it is usually the best position in which to pray!
Michael’s legacy lives on through his music, not the circumstances surrounding his death, but this is only possible if we as fans decide this is how we choose to remember him.

p.s. Take the word GOOD, now remove one O! What are YOU left with, GOD….that’s right GOD!

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Writing Out Loud:The Blame Game


We tend to look the other way a lot of times when celebrities operate above the law. We forgive them when they use drugs, beat their wives, have affairs, even when they lip synch. It’s so easy to forget celebrities have choices too and usually the means to make better ones too. Now that some time passed, I think there is an equal amount of blame to share. I think first and foremost some of this blame most deservingly goes to Michael Jackson himself. Michael Jackson had access to health care nearly 50 million people can only dream about. As much as I adored him, Michael should have been more proactive in his choices regarding his health and ultimately his “friends”. The biggest question I have is whether or not Michael Jackson was truly informed as a patient on the contraindications of using this powerful drug and what finally led to his consent to have it administered.
I agree that Dr. Murray whether by omission or commission is indeed negligent if the news accounts of the events on that fateful day are accurate. Is Dr. Murray however, being made the only scapegoat so that it appears to the rest of us justice is being served? I just don’t think this entire burden is Dr. Murray’s alone. Good can come from any situation, maybe this will shed some serious light on celebrities and illicit drug use, doctor shopping, and out of control lifestyles. We all should learn to care just a little bit more about other people. People who aren’t celebrities “bump” into us all the time on purpose and we’re so busy pretending we don’t SEE them. Emotions run hot and they often affect our ability to think rationally. We’re going to be inundated with salacious gossip, innuendo, rumors and sound bytes to increase ratings in the upcoming weeks. I honestly cannot wait until this entire sordid mess is behind us. I caution all of you to pay more attention to the people who cross your paths. This is a teachable moment for all of us SILENCE IMPLIES CONSENT!
Be Blessed!







Friday, January 29, 2010

Writing Out Loud:One Life to Live

What if your life insurance failed to pay your surviving loved ones death benefits because after careful examination they concluded that you had never lived? One wrong turn could change a life quicker than it takes to make instant coffee. Most would disagree that a traffic jam could be the safest place on earth. I don’t think any of us are ever truly aware of the enormous work angels do on our behalf. Yesterday as I was leaving my subdivision I was reminded of this. I was alert and had the right of way as I made my way to the traffic light. Out of nowhere a driver in a van decided to make a right turn just as I was passing. I honestly don’t think the other driver ever saw me coming but I’m thankful God did. I cannot lie I wasn’t always saved so giving the other driver my middle finger and shouting a litany of obscenities would’ve been my “normal” gut reaction. I sensed that my reaction to what could’ve been was a direct result of the inward change that takes place after one receives salvation. It’s an invisible inward change that usually manifests outward visibly. Yesterday that van was mere inches from driving my steering wheel into my chest and I never flinched. The only action I took was a tap on my horn to let them know I was there.
Yesterday was -11F the weather didn’t prevent God from sending me some heavenly help. That van didn’t crash into me not because of a tap on my horn it was because of the presence of heaven. I graciously let the other driver have the right of way. Isn’t if funny that when you’re the driver in the wrong how quickly you want to get away from the carnage you could’ve caused? The van quickly sped away but we ended up at the same light. At that light at least for a couple minutes we were probably glad things ended up as good as they had. This time I chose to go left and the other driver went right. It took a couple hours before the events of what could’ve been my last moments on earth sat in. I sat on my couch as tears streamed down my face. I couldn’t express my gratitude. I was just thankful, thankful that a loving God goes ahead of me and commands His heavenly host to protect me. Sometimes a near accident is all it takes to remind us not only of how precious life is but that I still have a lot of living to do.  I could dial 911 it’s usually not warranted because Jesus is already on the scene.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Hindering Heartbreak?


So I’m in the bookstore today and an acquaintance of mine comes over to me. She is positively glowing about something. I literally thought she’d burst if I didn’t ask her why she was so happy. She asks me if I would like to hear a “love story”. I’m like “sure” why not? With exaggerated hand movements, she goes on to tell me about a man she knew over 35 years ago and how he’d suddenly resurfaced in her life. So I’m all excited listening as she sojourns down memory lane. She tells me how they’ve been seeing each other (seeing each other to include making snow angels, walks in the park, and kissing). I’m all excited for her and I begin to ask questions about the guy, you know “normal” questions women ask each other when a guy has her all excited. I begin to listen closely to her answers, noting how incredibly vague they are. So I ask the $64,000 question, “IS HE MARRIED”? The look on her face could melt snow. What rendered me speechless wasn’t her admission this guy was in fact married but that she could care less about his wife. Can a person be approaching 60 and be that dense simultaneously? I asked her but it reverberated through my mouth more like a statement, “are you nuts?” This woman is almost 60 and I couldn’t believe I had to explain to her why she couldn’t date a married man. I tried to be as non-judgmental as I could without sounding too “preachy”. I flat out told her that this is not a love story but a nightmare. I didn’t stop there but proceeded with a litany of questions about her “love story”.


1. Does his wife know?
2. Do you get that “lust” “loneliness” and “love” are three very different things?
3. Are you having sexual relationships with this man
4. Is this relationship worth your peace?
5. How would you feel if you were the wife?
6. Why don’t you care more about yourself?
7. Do you understand this man is a liar?
8. How do you feel afterwards when he returns home to his wife?
9. Do you think he’s really going to marry you?
10. Why do you keep involving yourself in these types of situations?

I’m watching her jaw drop as she searches for the right words to rationalize her poor choices again. I suspect I’ll be waiting until she can begin to deal with her low regard of herself. I remember being in a similar “love story”! Where is my knight in shining armor? He’s probably still with his wife, the wife he told me he was leaving too I suppose. So ladies, just remember you deserve better from every man you allow into your life. If a man can “talk you out of your panties, he can talk you out of your promise”. God promises the best for us but you can only know this if you determine you want the best for yourself.