My Joy Is Contagious Make Sure You Catch It!

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Thursday, November 13, 2008

The Diary of A Former Whore PT 7

Monday 1:01am

Dilated eyes fixed on the podium big like a deer

In my estimation I've earned the girl’s tears

Transparency cancels pretense an eased conscience wearable and sheer

I hammer the ladies with anecdotes of the past and recent years

Sharing individual stories are shared over Kleenex and hugs not pretzels and beer

Sex, lies, and videotape maybe too much for an "untouched" virgin's ears

The secrets in this room beg for a politician's campaign to smear

Sisters openly discussing everything no subject is a road we won't veer

Holding hands through our darkness so the "light" at the end of the tunnel for all is clear

Convinced that triumph is attainable in unison, we rise and cheer

Tuesday 2:02am

Born at different times, yet our souls are the same age

They give me purpose keep me on an even page

I'm still cute and Power Point earns me a livable wage

Helping consumes the void where there was only hate

Agape love won't be confined or locked in a cage

Life, the place you don't get to practice before you go on stage

The pressure of living is too hard to gauge

Spontaneous combustion is possible given enough rage

If I can get one girl through this day

She will get up tomorrow and stare a bright future in the face

We are all molded by the "Great Potter" fashioned out of marred clay

AIDS hasn't claimed me after "HIS" righteousness I chase

Victory came by learning the error of my ways

Now I go to life instead of work and still get paid

No longer condemned by the choices I made

I continue helping young girls feel the same

I teach them about the man with the unforgettable name

Jesus Christ, the healer of all my pain

The eraser of all my shame

This Jewish man responsible for all my "foreign" aid

Like Barack Obama I vow to finish a "historical" race

Locked on target like my man Max Payne

Krispy Kreme doughnuts that unforgettable glaze

I eat a whole dozen fat grams can't take joy's place

Wednesday 3:03pm

I use to pray as often as I paid the water bill

God seemed like a distant relative, not a Father I could feel

The course before me a mountain not a mole hill

"He" forgave me after the life I've lived, the blood I spilled

Dying to belong when it was sinful desires I had to kill

Regret is a quota I hope I never fill

If guilt could I know “it” would send me a bill

Check my till

Not empty still

I was born with an unrelenting will

To live abundantly, go to heaven then chill

I'm still cute, reclaiming my life right now is my latest thrill

Thursday 4:04am

Like a ravaging cancer that has spread to my other breast

Negative thoughts still creep assaulting my rest

Dreams of my youth wasted with a pimp in a velvet vest

I laugh at AIDS thinking it's my final test

Money divides classes of people, but sex adds them in the same bed

The naughty deal done we fly back to our segregated nests

Friday 5:05am

Most of the men I slept with, if known would headline tomorrow's news

Hush money did more than make me quiet it coerced me to be mute

I was always fearful that my skeletons will jump out and say boo

"Lynn Moore" is my real name but "whore" was the "one" I answered to

The "John's" who paid for me had the power sex was a power tool

Benjamin Franklin gave me my cues

Thousands of 3 minute love affairs no wonder my body feels used

Say what you want, I paid some hefty dues

"John" or "Jane" can’t throw money and get me to what they want me to do

Legal living pays the least a clear conscience and pays dividends never taught in school

Getting up and going to life, not work, a 401K with eternal returns cool

The "she" living in my head evicted on the 12th of June

I served "her" notice after the Holy Spirit challenged "her' to a duel

All my "demons" have been exorcised, drowning in redemption's pool

Salvation is a choice. Sanctification is an entirely different process too

I don't need the comfort of a man I can make it through

Feeling so good I assassinated my flesh it was the perfect coup

Smiles linger on my face like early morning dew

"Lynn Moore" the former whore, journaling new rules

Saturday 6:06pm

An election season at the end, things start to get colder

Changing like John McCain as I scour my new client's folders

Seated in eerie silence feigned toughness rolls like a Colorado boulder

The sullen face of one girl strikes me mentally I reach out to hold her

Condemnation over everything "she" is the clay that molds her

Refusing to give up, I repeat they shall live their lives like its golden

Life comes full circle. The more you know you grow a little bolder

Sunday 7:07am

Journaling thoughts helps me understand what all of this means

Gripping the rails skating in small circles afraid to let go in the rink

Falling still trying to hold on I get up and don't blink

Some things I did because I could, others because I didn't think

Swallowing pills sensing good and bad angels on the scene

The whole bottle I didn't want to feel another thing

Bad angels chased me to death. Good angels chased life back into me

The entire bottle I still managed to stand on my feet

AIDS lies dormant basically balled up in a sheet

Jesus is wholly responsible for "Lynn Moore" needs

I'm cured of my "Fetish" I can't wear your clothes anymore Eve

No more paw prints I cover my tattoos with tailored sleeves

I purr like a conservative Republican not a liberal Democrat in a frenzied heat

Before I dress I caress good vibes positive words feel better than tweed

Weren't you ever taught that "nothing" is what it seems

The mind wanders to places never knowing where those places lead

Are you baffled at how a "whore" could be exonerated of murder in 7 weeks

Imagine my face when I realized this "Diary" was a 49 day dream

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