My Joy Is Contagious Make Sure You Catch It!

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Friday, October 31, 2008

A Woman's Threat!

Being so candid causes women's hearts to ache

Get over it fellas

Sometimes the devil wears Prada

Most of the time we wear fakes

Cornbread, pork chops, & collard greens

Have all left you jaded

"Angel" hair pasta & "Devil's" Food cake

Undeniably, the reasons your looks have faded

Baby, if you looked like "Him"

Maybe, I'd wear a dress like that

Something way too short & sexy

With a deep "V" going down the length of my back

But you don't look like "Him"

You're still happy looking like that

So I'm glueing the tags back on

And then I'm taking the dress back

Gluttony is a the major enemy

And food is really "not" your friend

Hand me my needle and thread

So I can "let" your slacks back out again

Your guilty, gravy stained face

Only confirms where you have been

You weren't hanging with your boys

You were "sneaking" to the refrigerator again

You say that you like " real" women

Just not the kind who wear the pants

Well, I wish you would "step up" to the scale

And "step back" from the pots & pans

You used to be so darn "dapper"

Versace, Cole, & Boss

Baby, I would've "rocked" that dress for you

I would've even let you take it off

Men expect women to look "perfect"

To the point, where we're plastic & fake

Leave the "other woman", the refrigerator

And get your fat ass in shape

Food for some, is a two-way street

For you, food is a greasy dead end

Soon there will be two more of you

And I'll be on Match.com seeking other men

Baby, I want to look "sexy" sometime

But Sweetie, I want you to look "sexy" too

I'm woman "enough" for one man

But, I'm just not woman "enough" for two

Maybe I won't be so repulsed

The next time that we sit down to eat

Our bedroom is not a "buffet"

Unless you're "helping" yourself to me

Men might be like buses

One may come every 15 minutes

But I don't wanna ride nothing

Where Betty Crocker been sittin


  1. That "Diary of a Former Whore" was really intense! REALLY INTENSE!

  2. Thank you.......there are 6 PTS in the saga of "Lynn Moore" (lol)


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